“Im so fucked up I just hit my head & it didn’t even matter” —Jaz
“Did you tap that, grandpa?” —Jazzmun
“I may fuck cats but I ain’t no queer” —Jazman
“I’m Kayleigh Spicer. Welcome to Jackass.” *in the arrrmmmms of an angeeelll…
“Shred on brothaah \m/ \m/” —
Ya know? Tiiiiim?
- Jaz: Dude wtf is going on i bought a size 2 pants at my work & theyre too big! idk how i keep losing wieght i eat like shit & a lot! haha fuck mee
- kay: Maybe you have doggy worms! gasspp!!!
- jaz: ...dude what if i do have a worm? no i probably wouldnt shit ahaha & i do that
- Jaz: I do that a lot haha
- Kay: check online theyll diagnose you with a million problems that are wrong with you
- jaz: aha nah im not gonna try to solve this. its not like i hate losing weight. if i start to look like a holocaust victim then ill look into it. my body is just auto adjusting to beach body hahaha.
- jaz: i say as i shove a donut in my food hole.
- kay: bahahahahahha! well i didnt wanna tell ya but you have flies all over your face.
- jaz: but those are my freeeeinds!
- jaz: This is todd & thats tim....& this is ted! hahaha
- kay: HAHAHAH i drooled... cause all those names are super hot!
- jaz: ...dude what if i do have a worm? no i probably wouldn't shit and i do that. i do that A LOT
Waving & laughing across a theatre full of people…to no one…
- That looks like a baby
- How dare you! That's my grandmother!
“Man my love life sucks! All I want is a nice Italian dinner and some hardcore vag pounding after. Is that too much to ask for?” —Kayla Michelle Spicker
Only Nicole will threaten to shit in a tattoo parlor.
“jesus crist a finding nemo reference! and i understood it? fuck i’m high” —
Nicole thinks she's clever about her filthy lies.
- N: I'm just clever for the way I talk
- K: If anything we're intelligent for catching on to your lies and your just a BITCH!
- J: WRITE THAT DOWN!